Living with an alcoholic spouse can be an emotional rollercoaster, filled with unexpected triggers that can send you into a tailspin. In the latest episode of the Married to Addiction podcast, we delve into these triggers – like the sound of a bottle opening – and explore how they affect us physically and emotionally. More importantly, we discuss practical tools to help you regain control and find peace in moments of distress.
Have you ever noticed your heart race at the sound of a bottle opening? You’re not alone. These sounds aren’t just noises; they are powerful signals tied to memories and fears. Understanding how your body reacts is the first step in reclaiming your peace. Our nervous system, conditioned by past experiences, often misinterprets these sounds as warnings of impending danger.
Let’s talk about the fight or flight response. Your body reacts to triggers as if they’re immediate threats, even when they aren’t. Recognizing this is crucial. It’s not about being weak; it’s about your body’s natural response to past trauma. But here’s the good news: what is wired can be unwired.
If this is something you’re navigating right now, I want to give you something gentle to hold onto in the middle of it.
I created a short, faith-based guide called “When You Feel Like You’re Losing Yourself.” It’s for the wife of an alcoholic who has been so focused on him — on his drinking, his moods, his chaos — that she’s lost sight of herself somewhere along the way.
If that sounds familiar, this was written for you.
Get your free guide: “When You Feel Like You’re Losing Yourself”
When triggers strike, how do you calm your racing heart?
Enter the self-hug – a simple, yet effective grounding technique. By crossing your arms over your chest and affirming your safety, you can signal to your nervous system that you’re okay. Practice this regularly, even when you’re not triggered, to teach your body what calm feels like.
Creating a plan can help you manage triggers effectively. Start by acknowledging your trigger, then use the grounding technique. Have pre-written phrases ready to reassure yourself. Lastly, designate a safe space in your home where you can retreat and reset when overwhelmed. Consistency in using this space can help your body associate it with safety.
Triggers are a part of life when living with an addicted spouse, but they don’t have to control you. By understanding your body’s reactions and employing grounding techniques, you can navigate these challenges with grace and resilience. Remember, you’re not alone in this journey, and with practice, you can find peace and healing.
If this hit close to home, you’re not alone — and you don’t have to figure it out by yourself.
Before you go — I made something that might help you breathe a little easier today. It’s free, it’s short, and it was written for wives in exactly your situation. Get ‘When You Feel Like You’re Losing Yourself’ here.
Or if you’re ready for a little more you can choose your next small step right here, where you can find quick tools and focused resources built for your hardest moments.
When you’re ready for support that helps you actually move differently through this — not just to understand it better, but show up differently inside of it — the Secret Sisters Circle is where that happens. Private, faith-based, and built for women who are ready for something to finally change. You can even try it free for 7 days.
Also, be sure to join me on the Married to Addiction podcast for more conversations around topics like this one.
